Tuesday, March 31, 2009

BLOGTEMPEST TEN: FAILURE

Blogtempest Two Thousand Nine started as a silent promise from Carmen to inner Carmen that he would have a blog post for each of March's 31 days, partly for himself but mostly for the betterment of the world at large, but it ended up as this pathetic, pile-up of suck.  Like water shoes, failure is a tough pill to swallow.  Luckily, due to a malfunctioning gag reflex, CP can't swallow pills.  So instead he spends his post-fail sulk time considering how out of an infinitely expanding universe a cold rock found its improbable way into the gravitational pull of the tiny star that could and that rock churned with belts of cinder and molten rock for centuries until the fiery lashings cooled and hardened and absorbed the star's miracle rays and gave rise to the only functioning ecosphere in millions of light years in every way and the hollow, bottomless crevices of the world were filled with cool oceans that gushed with life and millions of years of unimaginable animals killing and doing mating dances with each other resulted in organisms so unfathomably complex that their processes laid the foundations for even more complex organisms to arise and kill each other and perform mating dances until a race of insane apes claimed hold of the once charred and ashen world and developed crude tools to fashion dwelling places and atonal instruments for their own petty amusements and then these hairy mammalians made quaint civilizations and bizarre mating rituals and this went on and on until the space rock was so chocked full of insane, mega-apes and crocodiles and computerized music devices that the super apes had nothing better to do but produce negative energies in relation to their failed blogging practices, completely ignoring the trillions upon trillions upon zillions of coincidences that resulted in their simple existence in a vacuum filled only with black, glacial nothing and how every lost second of their fleeting, decomposing being was such an unabated miracle in its own right that getting upset about almost anything is a veritable crotchshot to the thousand upon thousands of forgotten strangers that came together over the mammoth course of history to produce them, a drop kick to the universe at the center of all this and the endless universes locked inside every last blog-bemoaning person, and this isn't even considering non-bloggers.  Let's Go Flyers.

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